Eiza Gonzalez is vulnerably sharing how facing public scrutiny about her physical appearance as a teenager has impacted her self esteem.

Back in 2007, Eiza starred as Dolores in the Mexican telenovela Lola: Érase Una Vez, taking solace in acting after the sudden death of her father.

However, after the first episode of the show aired, she was faced with an onslaught of negative media attention dissecting her face and body.

“[Viewers] were waiting for the reveal of this character, and I came on stage, and I sang a song, whatever. The next morning, I’m watching the version of Today in Mexico, and they’re gonna talk about it. I’m like, ‘Oh my God, it’s just happening, this is crazy.’ I’m doing what I wanna do. And the presenters came on, and they’re 40 and 50-year-olds, and they’re like, ‘Ugh, she’s so ugly. She’s so fat. They could have gotten anyone, like why would they get her?’ Oh my God, it was just so jarring. And I was just like sitting there, like embarrassed with myself. Like even [now] it makes me tear up,” she said while on the “Dinner’s On Me” podcast.

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The now 35-year-old Baby Driver actress went on to describe how the criticism still affects her as an adult.

“Now you become this child where you’re chasing approval, and now you’re like completely lost of identity. And you’re also completely lost because you’re mourning and you’re grieving, so you’re sad. And I’m touring and having to smile and be a role model and pretend like I’m okay when everyone’s bombarding [me]. I definitely got lost. I was very unkind to myself, my body, my thoughts, my soul, because I just never felt good enough. And it’s something that stays with you forever because it’s sort of brands you, it marks you for life. And so it becomes a catch-up,” she said.

If you didn’t see, last week, Eiza gave details about her new relationship.